Affluenza? Sign me up!
Lets cut the bullshit. If you're white in United States your life will likely be easier than if you were non-white. White people have advantages over others in our culture, and lets be crystal clear, not because of some mystical divinely granted superiority, but because we institutionally reinforce this reality.
Let's take a closer look at the recent death of four people in Fort Worth, Texas. A young man named Ethan Couch 16, gets shit-housed after ostensibly getting his drivers license that afternoon, and runs down 12 people, 4 of which die. I know, I know, "What does this have to do with race?" well, besides the poorly timed Fast and Furious play on words (RIP Mr. Walker), it should be noted that all people involved were... white. It's a good thing too otherwise this kid might not have even been arrested.
The age old judicial question "How does one adjudicate when race is not a factor?" I mean the poor judge, having to decide a case where the victims and the accused are both white. It's not like the camina de pastel of the Santa Rosa deputy (white) who shot one Andy Lopez, 13 year old (Mexican) seven times. The judge stopped just short of awarding that motherfucker a medal - although paid time off is pretty sweet. Don't lose sleep over the Deputy's future; he still has his job after all. Or how about the murder of Oscar Grant a black teen at the hands of a white cop, shall I go on?
Fortunately for our conflicted robe, our judicial system has a second metric for responsibility: money. The defense argued that the little shithouser was a victim of Affluenza. Only in America, "Waaahhh! My back hurts from carrying around all this gold!" Basically, he was raised with too much money and not taught the difference between right and wrong - and left for that matter - and should therefore be sent to therapy - not prison. I wonder if any environmental factors such as, I don't know, poverty comes to mind, have been used as a defense. 'No' is the answer in case you're not picking up on my strongly worded tone. Prison is a place for poor minorities. The statistics are staggering. Black males have the highest rate of imprisonment at 6.5 times that of Whites. And that's not considering the percent of the population these races make up - 13% and 72% respectively!
Maybe I'm too pessimistic, perhaps I should throw on the old Hedberg glasses and hope the reality is not as bleak as it appears. So I don't mind if I do. Maybe the judge is a just compassionate individual that looks beyond race and money with a soft spot for rehabilitating teens. Turns out that in March of 2012, according to the Tarrant County Criminal DA, the same judge sentenced a black teen, 14, to 10 years in prison for a punch that resulted in the death of a 40 year old white male (he hit his head on the pavement after getting punched).
This is where I the author give sagacious advice on what YOU can DO to change the system... well the system does't give a shit about you and it's not as if it ran out of fucks to dish out, my advice raise your kids to be rich white police officers.